Southwest Flight 935

Oh, this is so much better. I'm in the back row again, by the window. Same exact spot as the flight down. The difference is, there is a space between me and the other guy sitting in this row. There were two open seats on this flight, and one of them is directly to my right.



I'm so overwhelmed with joy, I look at the guy next to me and exclaim, "this is great, I'll buy you a drink." He looks at me for a second, then responds, "sure that sounds good." From there we make small talk about where we live, what we do for work, what we were doing in Sacramento, etc. He seems like an alright guy, it could be a lot worse. Now when I say I'll "buy him a drink," what I mean is I'll use my drink coupons Candice gave me. Candice is not only my step sister, but also a flight attendant for Southwest Airlines. Let's keep the source of my coupons our little secret, OK?

Jesus, I can't stop staring at the girl two seats up from me. Brunette with somewhat fashionable hair, a little too much makeup, probably 23, and about as cute as can possibly be. She has a small stud on the left side of her straight, but angular nose. Radiohead's "All I Need," is playing. The song is arguably the sexiest thing the band has ever recorded, and just adds to the lustful feelings I'm beginning to experience. She's talking to the guy next to her and I find myself zoning out, watching her mouth move and thinking impure thoughts. "Good god," I think to myself. "This girl could pass for Katy Perry's little sister." My mind wanders, and I start to fantasize an encounter with this vixen, and then. . .

"Excuse me sir, would you like something to drink?" I'm torn from my wonderful imaginary world by a doofus middle-aged attendant. I hesitate for about half a second, then say, "I want three Crown and Cokes." I expect her to laugh, shake her head in disapproval. "All for just you?" she asks. "Yes," I quickly reply. A slight grin breaks out across my face. I feel just like Hunter S. Thompson. We stare at each other for a second, the she says, "OK then, that will be $15. I hand her a booklet of drink tickets, good for all three drinks. I persuade my neighbor to get a cocktail. "Why not," I say, "you're on vacation still."

The piggy attendant brings the four drinks and puts them on the tray between us. I look over at my neighbor and say, "I'm going to enjoy myself on this flight. . .mark my words."