For years I've done things like refer to my "friends" in the band The Ever Changing Sky. Or, when ordering Mexican food, throwing up the air quotes and asking for a "beef" burrito while winking at the waiter. This is especially effective as it lets the server know you're in on their little secret - the "beef" is actually dog or cat meat. It's also fun to use quotations where it completely changes the meaning of what you're trying to get across. Ex: Later on tonight I plan on "going out to eat" with my "roommate." This statement might actually mean something more like: Later on tonight, I plan on "having intercourse" with "that street walker I saw out on Aurora Ave."
So, take a look at the blog. Here's a few of my favorites so far:
The fact that "chicken" is in quotes leaves the diner to guess what the salad sandwich is really made of.
What the hell is "period stuff?" I'm thinking tampons, midol and tissues for crying. Jesus. . .that was sexist!
Well, I guess since "No" is in quotes, we can drink it up and party like hell!
2 comments:
Do you mean, Like when I call My "FRIEND" Ben and he doesn't have time to call me back. Although he has "TIME" to post in his blog how he never calls his "old friends" back, HOWS THAT FOR PUNC-CHEW-FUCKINGING-ATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HAHAHA! Good one man. Wow, it sounds like you're holding quite s grudge over this whole phone thing. I thought we discussed this - talking on the phone is so 90's. Now if I need to communicate, I like totally just text, e-mail, blog or Twitter. LOL.
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